IVY : If you know me well, I am a risk adverse person. And when it came to relationships, I am even more so. I don't even believe in dating guys if I don't think he is a "potential" person. Sometimes, I ask myself, if you don't give him a chance, how would you know he is not right?
Well, I tell myself, I go with my gut, if I don't think he is right, that's it! No chance! Why waste time in dating? So as you can guess, I do write off a lot of guys just from the first meet. No feeling, No chemistry, No go!
So obviously as I went into this serious electronic (sms, phonecalls, emails) relationship with Jeh, many a times I was doubtful. I only saw this guy a couple of times in a span of few days in US. We talked but it was like short casual conversations with a new found friend.
I was beginning to even forget what he even looked like.
But, our feelings developed after, in the writings, emails, phone-calls.
We knew it was getting serious, and a natural next...meeting face to face.
Jeh planned a trip to Malaysia in October 2005. This is like "the trip". "The trip" to see each other again. "The trip" to confirm what we have and where we are headed. We even told our parents about each other. I don't remember my parents reactions but I think they were silently excited and curious about this guy who is thousands of miles away.
Jeh will be back for 3 weeks. I had the whole 3 weeks trip planned out to the dot. So much to do. The excitement is crazy.
But my risk adverse self told me...No! No! We will decide if we can even be together when he comes back to Malaysia. Or at least, I will only decide if we are really meant to be together when he gets here! Or maybe I have already decided but just afraid to admit it.
Well, I tell myself, I go with my gut, if I don't think he is right, that's it! No chance! Why waste time in dating? So as you can guess, I do write off a lot of guys just from the first meet. No feeling, No chemistry, No go!
So obviously as I went into this serious electronic (sms, phonecalls, emails) relationship with Jeh, many a times I was doubtful. I only saw this guy a couple of times in a span of few days in US. We talked but it was like short casual conversations with a new found friend.
I was beginning to even forget what he even looked like.
But, our feelings developed after, in the writings, emails, phone-calls.
We knew it was getting serious, and a natural next...meeting face to face.
Jeh planned a trip to Malaysia in October 2005. This is like "the trip". "The trip" to see each other again. "The trip" to confirm what we have and where we are headed. We even told our parents about each other. I don't remember my parents reactions but I think they were silently excited and curious about this guy who is thousands of miles away.
Jeh will be back for 3 weeks. I had the whole 3 weeks trip planned out to the dot. So much to do. The excitement is crazy.
But my risk adverse self told me...No! No! We will decide if we can even be together when he comes back to Malaysia. Or at least, I will only decide if we are really meant to be together when he gets here! Or maybe I have already decided but just afraid to admit it.
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